Wild Hogs

Day 70

Wytheville, VA to Christiansburg, VA

Distance: 56 miles

Sweet Treats: abound

Groundhogs: Around

After posing the question only yesterday, I have to say that today was much more of a typical day that I’ve had in some time.

Waking early, but not too early, I started the day with a lap round Wytheville in search of some decent breakfast. Maybe a couple of eggs with the usual sides. But unfortunately, the cupboard of Wytheville was bare… all that was open were the various chain restaurants.

So, after the W-Loop, I ended up pretty much directly opposite my motel at the Sonic Drive-In dipping French Toast Sticks into tiny pots of breakfast syrup. At the time it was rather like a guilty pleasure, but I felt a little sick once I set off.

The route out of town was rolling but smooth. No long climbs but a few sneaky little steep grades from time to time, and a misty view across to the mountains.

My first (and only) stop of the day was at the Draper Mercantile, where I was greeted by Thomas, who I’d spoken to on the phone yesterday, and who had offered to come and get me in order to fix my bike.

We hung out in the bike shop there, The Junction, for a little while to chat. Thomas did the TransAm in 2012 and is planning the Southern Tier for Jan-March 2015 – since I’ve done that route too, with a few diversions, I was able to give him a my thoughts on it, and to get a little jealous!

As I entered the main building, I found a chic and hopping restaurant/café with the most amazing buffet brunch going on. If I’d known, I would have hot-footed it straight to Draper rather than looping Wytheville. Although I would have been slightly concerned that the Bottomless Mimosas might well have led to a Legless Touring Cyclist…

Instead, I ordered a suitably unctuous slab of coconut cream cake, to top up the sugar and fat count... 

Between Draper and Christiansburg, there were not only more hills, but also some interesting wildlife. I don’t have pictures, unfortunately, which is what seems to happen when these little devils catch on that I am trying to snap a shot of them.

I saw another Heron today. I’ve seen a few in recent days, and many over the whole trip, but they have always been straight into flight mode before I can even get the camera out of my bag. I don’t think it helps, these days, that I greet them with the line:

“Ah, so, Mr Heron, veee meet again,” in a fake Russian accent. A couple of times I have even hummed the Bond theme tune and performed the opening sequence spin with the gun (for which read “camera”) too.

But today, I was blessed with the presence of Groundhogs. It’s funny, because I don’t think I would have known what they were if it had not been for the fact that Mark and I made a little diversion across a field yesterday in his truck to deliver a cold beer to a guy who was working on the hay. We ran over a huge crater, and Mark laughed and said “Damn Groundhogs.” Apparently, they are prolific diggers when it comes to their burrows.

Today, my first sighting was of a pair of chubby brown/grey furry haunches wobbling their way into the undergrowth.

The next was again in the grass by the side of the road, but this one looked directly at me before fleeing into a nearby field. And so I had to seek an audience with the town Groundhog, Christian, instead.

“So, what’s it like being a Groundhog in Virginia then?” I asked.

“Well darlin’, Virginia, Pennsylvania, anywhere, it’s never been the same since that dang movie,” he said.

“What, Groundhog Day,” I said, enthused. “I loved that film.”

Christian raised his furry brows at me, then narrowed his eyes and grimaced.

“Bill Murray, Andie Mcwhatsername,” I continued hesitantly. “Actually, she was a bit annoying,” I conceded. “But not as bad as in Four Weddings.”

“Anywayyyys,” Christian drawled. “The thing is, and it’s all their fault, everyone thinks we’re boring now. That Groundhogs are dull.”

I waited, and Christian looked around nervously as he spoke, his words speeding up…

“We’re not,” he said, looking sideways at me and then around the room to people who weren’t even speaking with us.

“Okaaay,” I said.

“No, because, we’re actually some of the funniest rodents you’ll ever come across,” he said, his words spilling out as I could see a case of hives starting to appear around his temples.

“Boy, oh boy,” he said. “Is it just me or is it hot in here?”

“Um, I don’t...” I started.

“And don’t you start by circling around me trying to see if you can see my shadow,” he said. “It only counts in February.”

And so I made my excuses and exited, politely declining the offer of Christian telling me his funniest joke.

“No really, it’s a good one,” I heard him call as the door swung behind me.

Groundhog, Christian Grimes, "I'm the funniest rodent I know."
"No, really, I am..."

I arrived early to my motel and, for the first time in ages, had some wallowing time before getting myself ready and heading out for a romantic meal for one in a superb fine dining restaurant near the motel.

Onto the final map tomorrow, 368 miles to go…

Me x